Lottery

Today's the day we are going to win it.  Just thought you'd all like to know, especially if Bob and I disappear tomorrow.  You'll know why.  Well, it'll either be the lottery or alien abduction, I suppose.  I'm hoping for the lottery win, as I suspect that I would not be fond of being "probed" by aliens.  Unless they look like George Clooney, and don't probe me "there" -- but I digress.


We always talked about "winning the lottery" but, well, we never bought tickets. So around my birthday, we started buying them. In fact the first one we bought may have actually been ON my birthday, which was a Wednesday (we play Powerball, Weds and Sats).  I figured since it was my 50th birthday, we were sure winners for that day. Alas, we did not even get one number right.  But today that all changes because I bought the ticket.  Our new plan is Bob will buy the $1 ticket on Saturdays, and I buy them on Wednesdays.  That plan just started, so today was the first one I bought, and of course it will win us the $94 Million Jackpot. Duh.


We do not play random numbers -- we play six numbers that are meaningful to us. I cannot tell you those numbers because if I did, then we'd have to share the Powerball pot with you. But because they are "special" numbers, and we play the same ones every time, we are sure to win, if not today than soon.  I'm just sure of it.  I mean, someone has to win, why not us? We are nice people. We are kind to animals and reasonably pleasant to humans, sometimes. And we would do good things with the money, after we got back from "disappearing" for about a month to avoid the inevitable media attention and people wanting handouts from the new rich ministers.  We will most likely be in Australia or New Zealand, maybe, or Clooney's house on Lake Como, if he rents it out, but I can't tell you exactly where (media again) -- we will check email though on our new iPhones.

What else would we do with the money?  Well, dear readers, anyone who reads my blog regularly and comments occasionally -- you will receive a lovely bottle of wine.  Oh hell, make it a whole case of wine!  Next we will buy a new house -- a ranch for sure, with no stairs, because Kayla and I struggle with stairs these days.  And the washer/dryer will be those cool ones Kelly Ripa talks about in those commercials, and they will be right off the master bedroom, like at Lezi Acres, so our maid won't have to walk as far to put away our neatly folded clean clothes.  And while it won't be too fancy or ostentatious, it will have one of those internal house vacuum cleaner things (to make it easier for the maid, again), and there will be a swimming pool with long lap lanes outside, and a jacuzzi, with a lovely view of the Pacific Ocean.  Oh, did I forget to mention?  The house will be on Maui.  Or maybe the Big Island.  But you are welcome to visit as we will have many guest rooms.


You're welcome.